Had anyone told me I would be quoting Steven “Dude looks like a lady” Tyler I would have said they were smoking what he smokes…the thing is he’s got this when he says “If you have a candle, the light won’t glow any dimmer if I light yours off of mine.”
I have been the recipient of more generosity than I ever could have imagined. From my family, from my family, from my family especially my Father. He didn’t have much, he didn’t know much but he shared everything from stories to lost dreams to insight to the yolk from his over easy eggs salted just perfectly to wint-o-green lifesavers. We spoke a similar language that only we could understand.
So many generous people have shared their knowledge with me throughout my career that it’s hard to list them all. Most notably my friend Cookie, a rare breed in the car business that thought it was ok, no more than ok, to share his vast, been there done that, know where the bodies are buried knowledge with a woman of all people. I’m not talking about the read the financial statement kind of knowledge I’m talking about the watch out for this trick, keep an eye out for this on the bill of sale kind of knowledge. It was invaluable but beyond that it was the same kind of knowledge my own father shared, the real life, you’ll get kicked in the ass once in a while knowledge in a kicked up more educated went to college version.
Over the course of the sixteen years I worked with him, he was my mentor, he was my friend and he became my confidant during a time when not much was going right. You can’t help but know an awful lot about each other’s families working together every single day. He knew my relationship with my father and I knew his relationship with his children especially his Muriel. So it was no surprise to me when my father died he could see the future.
In the infinity of life that we all share, I have to believe that a promise kept is more important than many other things. If something happens to me, he said…you’ve got Muriel. Of course I would, and so I do. Through the miracle of universal alignment she lives four doors away on our little Stowe Ln. It’s been an easy friendship full of shared experiences and memories of both her father and mine. It’s my hope that one day she will think of me as one of the generous people in her life and fulfill her promise of helping me grow old with a sippy cup of wine in my hand…just sayin
I had the honor of seeing her married this past weekend, of chauffeuring her in a shiny BMW the way her Father would have, of authenticating the day through photos that were beautiful but regrettably missing one of the most important people in her life. We didn’t speak of it, we didn’t have to.
It was a joyous day none the less, had I had a daughter I would want her to be exactly like Muriel. Beautiful, real, take after her Father in that sarcastic listen closely so you don’t miss anything kind of way. We will always share the Father’s Daughter mentality, sentimentality although she will poo poo being capable of any such thing. What we know like we know is that they are exuberantly watching from somewhere and even if they’re not they have shared so much that we will never run out of all that they have left behind for us.
To that end the lesson for both of us from our Father’s has been to share what we know, not just our knowledge but our way of looking at things, our perspective if you will, our sense of humor, our sense of family and our friendship so that we too can leave behind bits of ourselves.
My dearest Muriel and Martina no amount of love and health and happiness can ever be enough for you. Know you’re loved, share your lives fully and leave behind all that makes you what and who you are, as individuals and as a couple, so that many can benefit from your having met and married. Like your wedding day I wish you just enough rain for luck I know like I know it will be a breathtaking life.
