{"id":831,"date":"2012-07-16T18:52:37","date_gmt":"2012-07-16T22:52:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/?p=831"},"modified":"2012-07-16T21:31:45","modified_gmt":"2012-07-17T01:31:45","slug":"no-decisions-required","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/2012\/07\/16\/no-decisions-required\/","title":{"rendered":"No Decisions Required"},"content":{"rendered":"

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I had two interesting conversations today; one out loud and one by email.\u00a0 Both made me think that I needed to be more explicit about how Ordinary Legacy should be viewed.\u00a0 This blog is about the everyday, the ordinary little things and thoughts and feelings that make up a life.\u00a0 Some, ok most of it, will be my life and some of it will be other lives and how they are being lived.\u00a0 In the end, and there will be an end, all those every day, ordinary little matters will make up an extraordinary legacy.\u00a0 Do not get in the way of someone building an extraordinary legacy, you could get hurt, you could be stuck living with regret, you could lose the lesson on how ordinary translates to extraordinary, just saying.<\/p>\n

My out loud conversation was with a few colleagues that were discussing an elder family member who was on the fringes of Alzheimer\u2019s and wanted ice cream for dinner.\u00a0 Her caretaker thought it best to argue for her to have dinner and then her ice cream.\u00a0 Hear me when I say this; in my later years if I want ice cream for dinner, give it to me.\u00a0 Where is the decision in this, why does it matter if I don\u2019t have a typical dinner?\u00a0 If I am living in a world of my own and it requires\/desires\/needs ice cream, really? Do I need to be deprived of it, would I even know if I was being deprived?\u00a0 Don\u2019t let a simple decision made by a simple mind escalate into a \u201cyou should have your vegetables\u201d kind of moment.\u00a0 Eat the ice cream, life is short, have dessert first\u2026isn\u2019t that how it goes?<\/p>\n

The other decisions that need to be made are not nearly that simple.\u00a0 Near end of life treatments for ailments that will ultimately bring you to the end of your journey; what should they be?\u00a0 How far should one go?\u00a0 Who should make those decisions? \u00a0Why are those decisions so hard to come to?\u00a0 Because no one is talking about them until they are looming large.<\/p>\n

These are terribly hard conversations but ultimately the most essential for everyone\u2019s comfort and dignity.\u00a0 We are unusual beings in that we have the ability to see the end of our lives unlike other species.\u00a0 The good news is we can plan and express our desires to those who love us and will ultimately be responsible for us.\u00a0 The bad news is that by knowing the end result we tend to lose the moment\u2026big time. \u00a0\u00a0The trick is to have the conversations early and then make the most of all those wonderful moments without the angst.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s what I know like I know; do not argue with me when I say no to all those heroic end of life procedures and treatments.\u00a0 I will be like every dog I\u2019ve ever had and know that it will be fruitless to subject myself to something that will make everyone else feel better that they \u201ctried everything\u201d.\u00a0 I will give you the same look that they have all given me\u2026I\u2019m done, I\u2019m tired, I want to enjoy your company and go in peace.\u00a0 Understand?\u00a0 No decisions required.<\/p>\n

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I had two interesting conversations today; one out loud and one by email.\u00a0 Both made me think that I needed to be more explicit about how Ordinary Legacy should be viewed.\u00a0 This blog is about the everyday, the ordinary little … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-831","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-pause-points"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p27hQ5-dp","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/831","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=831"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/831\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":837,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/831\/revisions\/837"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=831"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=831"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=831"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}