{"id":1690,"date":"2013-11-17T19:51:02","date_gmt":"2013-11-18T00:51:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/?p=1690"},"modified":"2013-11-17T19:54:06","modified_gmt":"2013-11-18T00:54:06","slug":"lady-shmady","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/2013\/11\/17\/lady-shmady\/","title":{"rendered":"Lady Shmady"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"022\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Woman, writer and lover of all things ordinary.\u00a0 That\u2019s how I describe myself; the word lady doesn\u2019t really exist for me.\u00a0 Not in the strictest definition of the word.\u00a0 From Wikipedia: The word lady<\/b> is a civil term of respect for a woman, specifically the female equivalent to gentleman or lord. Once confined to usage when specifically addressing women of high social class or status; over the last 300 years, the term has spread to embrace every adult woman.<\/em><\/p>\n

From Merriam Webster: A woman who behaves in a polite way, a woman of high social position, a man\u2019s girlfriend, a woman of superior social position, a woman of refinement and gentle manners.<\/em><\/p>\n

So it took 300 years, and you believe that the term has morphed into one that embraces every adult woman, thus the more accurate Merriam Webster version of the definition.\u00a0 Come on.\u00a0 There is a connotation to the word lady that I\u2019ve never fit into and thankfully it has served me well.<\/p>\n

Being among the first women to wear pants in the banking industry finally getting rid of the stockings and garter belts was huge in the early 70\u2019s.\u00a0 Consistently applying for \u201cHelp Wanted \u2013 Male\u201d positions made me very unladylike. Standing up for what I believe in, voicing my opinion, being the one to introduce other women to education for the sake of learning rather than marrying, and to this day trying to insure young women don\u2019t take for granted where we came from, all not very lady like.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t get me wrong, I\u2019m not militant. I believe I\u2019m pragmatic. I\u2019m not picketing or demonstrating just going about my daily life trying to live what I believe, my truth. In researching this post I came across several \u201crules\u201d one must follow to be considered a lady:<\/p>\n

Make introductions, say please and thank you, have good posture, be respectful toward others, be charming, don\u2019t use profanity or overeat or drink excessively, maintain your personal hygiene, dress elegantly and keep your clothing clean and pressed.\u00a0 Don\u2019t wear excessive makeup or revealing clothing. Really?\u00a0 I can\u2019t.\u00a0 Isn\u2019t this just common sense, isn\u2019t this just part of being a genuine human being.\u00a0 Aren\u2019t these the same rules that a \u201cgentleman\u201d should be following to make his way in the world?<\/p>\n

I love Nora Ephron\u2019s quote: \u201cWhatever you choose, however many roads you travel, I hope that you choose not to be a lady. I hope you will find some way to break the rules and make a little trouble out there. And I also hope that you will choose to make some of that trouble on behalf of women.\u201d<\/p>\n

Long before I knew about this quote I chose not to be a lady.\u00a0 I chose to be a genuine, caring, educated, outspoken, human being.\u00a0 As a kid, I lost many a white glove and soiled many a dress. I questioned authority, so much so that I can\u2019t imagine that my parents ever spoke to me again after my teens.\u00a0 I changed drastically after those knock down drag out temper tantrums in the name of what is fair and progressive.\u00a0 I did not, however, change into a \u201clady\u201d.<\/p>\n

I feel like the word lady should always be in quotes.\u00a0 The meanings are outdated and condescending and would never be replicated in \u201cgentlemen\u201d speak.\u00a0 Men are always talking about women being a \u201clady on the street and a freak in the bed\u201d. How about simply embracing the strength of woman and knowing that their common sense is honed well enough to know that public and private behavior is just plain protocol. Seriously stop talking garbage people.<\/p>\n

How about we discard both the lady and gentlemen monikers and discuss things on a human level.\u00a0 On a level that contributes the best of both sexes and all that is human to a collective equality.\u00a0 What did I say?\u00a0 It could actually happen, look at the number of fathers staying home with kids, look at the number of woman finally running for office, look at the number of people becoming minimalist in their own fashion.\u00a0 So much is changing that defies the gender \u201chigh standards\u201d.<\/p>\n

I started thinking about this subject when my friend described her Mom as a true lady.\u00a0 I believe she was a true lady in the context of the time she grew up in.\u00a0 For those of us who grew up at that moment in time when we finally had the nerve to voice our opinions all bets were off on the ladylike portion of the show.\u00a0 It is an outdated term that I truly hope will be replaced by something like woman of substance, man of substance, person of substance.<\/p>\n

Many of you know that I am a huge fan of the six word memoir.\u00a0 I hope my legacy will read something like this:\u00a0 A woman of substance who shared.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Woman, writer and lover of all things ordinary.\u00a0 That\u2019s how I describe myself; the word lady doesn\u2019t really exist for me.\u00a0 Not in the strictest definition of the word.\u00a0 From Wikipedia: The word lady is a civil term of respect … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[5,6],"tags":[342,339,340,341],"class_list":["post-1690","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-in-the-company-of-women-2","category-pause-points","tag-genuine","tag-lady","tag-ladylike","tag-women-of-substance"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p27hQ5-rg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1690","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1690"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1690\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1695,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1690\/revisions\/1695"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1690"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1690"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1690"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}