{"id":1260,"date":"2013-01-20T18:51:25","date_gmt":"2013-01-20T23:51:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/?p=1260"},"modified":"2013-01-20T20:12:40","modified_gmt":"2013-01-21T01:12:40","slug":"50-shades-of-grey","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/2013\/01\/20\/50-shades-of-grey\/","title":{"rendered":"50 Shades of Grey"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"50<\/a><\/p>\n

No I\u2019m not talking about that here today gone tomorrow S and M manual that tried to call itself a novel.\u00a0 Yes I read the first one and thought oh boy this is interesting, did I go out and buy handcuffs, no.\u00a0 Did I read the second one where they were continuing on their \u201cjourney\u201d and actually trying to make a \u201cstory\u201d out of a really bad piece of writing? Yes.\u00a0 Did it even cross my mind to read the third one? No, so terrified was I that they were going to try for a happy ending I totally lost interest\u2026just sayin.\u00a0 I\u2019m talking about my hair you dirty minded people.<\/p>\n

As is usually the case in my new life, several things have converged to make me rethink coloring my hair.\u00a0 I went to Anna, my newest hair dresser, for a cut and she said, \u201cNo color?\u201d No, maybe in two weeks.\u00a0 \u201cYou need it.\u201d No it can wait. \u201cYou sure?\u201d \u00a0Anna are you going to cut my hair? Really?\u00a0 Now I came to find this particular beauty parlor, and I use that term deliberately, because I was sick to death of paying $125.00 for my cut and color every 6-8 weeks at the salon.\u00a0 This is an old style beauty parlor with the smell of ammonia in the air, men over 60 dropping off their mothers for a \u201cwash and set\u201d, rows of Aquanet cans in the showcase, you get the picture.\u00a0 But\u2026I could get a cut and color for $75.00, come on.<\/p>\n

The first time Anna colored my hair, and it\u2019s been only once, she didn\u2019t use any of that Vaseline type stuff that keeps the color off your face.\u00a0 Don\u2019t worry she said in her Greek accent, the color will take better.\u00a0 Yes I did have ring around the hairline, you bet and yes the entire world knew I just got my hair colored.\u00a0 Not my style.\u00a0\u00a0 I was so hopeful because my dearest, best former stylist, who moved to California, was Greek; I somehow thought it would run in the ethnicity.\u00a0 Wrong, I miss you Maria.<\/p>\n

The next thing that happened was a guest on the Katie Couric show who relinquished all makeup and fashion related accoutrement.\u00a0 Her motivation?\u00a0 Phoebe Baker Hyde put\u2019s it like this:<\/p>\n

The Beauty Experiment started with a dazzling new dress, bought to produce utter fabulousness at a holiday party. But even when Phoebe Baker Hyde paired the dress with the right shoes and tied its ribbon belt in a perfect bow, it failed to deliver: the person inside was still an inexperienced parent, an awkward foreigner and a woman trailing in the wake of her husband\u2019s more successful career.<\/i><\/p>\n

In response, Phoebe swore off Beauty and all her trappings: makeup, new clothes, salon haircuts, and jewelry. This radical beauty cleanse lasted a year, but ignited the author\u2019s ongoing quest to outgrow the fantasy of feminine perfection and remake the mantle of womanhood in the only size that fits\u2013her own.<\/i><\/p>\n

I get it; it can be tough when you\u2019re surrounded by advertising and pressure from society to find the right balance of beauty.\u00a0 Beauty is\u2026.wait for it\u2026.only skin deep.\u00a0 Poor Phoebe is probably in her thirties, I\u2019m in my late fifties so I get it better than she does.\u00a0 Add menopause to that equation and I could give a shit less what you think.\u00a0 My makeup has been dwindling for years.\u00a0 But I\u2019ve got to say I think it\u2019s because my hair could carry my looks, I\u2019ve got great hair. I\u2019ve also got great eyes and you will never see me without lipstick.\u00a0\u00a0 But I digress.<\/p>\n

The next thing is Zumba.\u00a0 I wear a bandana when I dance because I can\u2019t stand my hair in my face or sweat in my eyes.\u00a0 Yes this fat girl dances with abandon and yes I burn at least a gazillion calories when I dance.\u00a0 So Phoebe shows up on Katie, I put on my bandana and there it is the hairline of fifty shades of gray.\u00a0 Stunning.\u00a0 But wait a minute it really is fifty different shades, some gray, some dark, and some silver.\u00a0 I\u2019m thinking hhmmmm.<\/p>\n

So on my way home from Zumba, I know I\u2019ve been using this shampoo that sucks because I\u2019m out of the one I normally use, I stop at Walgreens on the way home, yes right after Zumba.\u00a0 Looking exactly like why men leave home\u2026let\u2019s try and remember who left whom for a minute.\u00a0 But I digress again.\u00a0 So down the shampoo isle to my beloved John Frieda and there is a new shampoo and conditioner, intense shine for brunettes.\u00a0 Hmmmm.\u00a0 I pick it up and don\u2019t you know it makes my hair even more fabulous.\u00a0 Even those grays that want to squiggle up and stick out are blending in perfectly.<\/p>\n

So I get to thinking.\u00a0 Always dangerous I know.\u00a0 Why not?\u00a0 My dear Summer Sister has not dyed her hair since its grown back after chemo and it is the most glorious shades of silver and gray I\u2019ve ever seen.\u00a0 She is rocking a younger Dame Judi Dench kind of cut but with her own I\u2019ve been there done that attitude.\u00a0 You all know I love her but WOW is she even more gorgeous then when we were younger.<\/p>\n

So I investigate further.\u00a0 Anne Kreamer has written a book called Going Gray, What I learned about beauty, sex, work, motherhood, authenticity and everything else that really matters.\u00a0 Don\u2019t you just love book titles that take up half a page?\u00a0 She explores this polarizing topic with those who dye and those who don\u2019t, those who are confident and those who still fear the reprisal.\u00a0 I do, however, like how she describes the coloring dilemma:<\/p>\n

Either way she says, once you start coloring at thirty or thirty-five or forty-the insidious creep of roots perpetually growing out, lighter or darker, always threatening to show themselves and expose the ruse-you are trapped on a treadmill.<\/i><\/p>\n

It\u2019s an interesting book but um not my dilemma.<\/p>\n

What it comes down to for me is time.\u00a0 I can think of a million other things I could be doing beyond sitting in the beauty parlor\/salon for hours with the goop plastered to my roots and no Vaseline to hide the dye line. \u00a0The incessant blah blah conversations that drive me to distraction while I\u2019m trying to read my Kindle with those little aluminum sheets around the arms of my glasses so I can see.<\/p>\n

The other thing is I\u2019m cheap. As you\u2019ve seen I\u2019m not beyond going to the Beauty School for a cut. Can\u2019t picture them doing a color though, visions of Frenchie from Grease come to mind.\u00a0 I do not want to spend money on color when I could spend it on a delicious La Tur cheese out of New Hampshire and bottle of Bear Print Pinot Noir.\u00a0 I have my priorities.<\/p>\n

The fact that I\u2019m getting older has not escaped me, especially in the last few weeks.\u00a0 The fact that I already know who I am is being confirmed over and over again.\u00a0 The fact that I am beautiful is still a story in the making.\u00a0 But the beauty I see for myself is natural, authentic, and reflective of where I\u2019ve been and what I know.\u00a0 My beauty is in the shine of my hair, whatever color it turns out to be, the fabulous signature lipsticks I wear, the uniform I\u2019m just now developing.\u00a0 I\u2019m thinking cute cardigans and scarves, belts to show off my tiny waist (oh yeah and my full hips, we\u2019ll get to that later).\u00a0 The renewed attention to health and the door-is-always-open home I have for anyone who needs to know what I know.\u00a0 I know like I know that you\u2019ve all been hounding me about how I look best in a short sassy haircut, that\u2019s not lost on my either.\u00a0 I\u2019d rather find someone who can give me that cute cut, for a decent price (sorry Anna the Aquanet didn\u2019t cut it for me) and amp up my eyes, lips and style than color and color and color to a mediocre long haired excuse for a woman.<\/p>\n

\"grey<\/a><\/p>\n

I\u2019d love to know how you feel about the subject. \u00a0I know like I know even more great changes are ahead for me.\u00a0 Can\u2019t wait to be free of the dye! And hear what you\u2019ve got to say.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

No I\u2019m not talking about that here today gone tomorrow S and M manual that tried to call itself a novel.\u00a0 Yes I read the first one and thought oh boy this is interesting, did I go out and buy … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[5,6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1260","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-in-the-company-of-women-2","category-pause-points"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p27hQ5-kk","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1260","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1260"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1260\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1270,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1260\/revisions\/1270"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1260"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1260"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ordinarylegacy.com\/word\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1260"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}