Hurricane Sandy

I’ve had a personal meteorologist for many years.  My sister can truly attest that I am, indeed, a hurricane.  She’s been living in the eye of this hurricane forever and only ventures to the gale force winds on occasion.   So the least they could have done, if they were going to name an official hurricane after me, was spell my name right.

Frankenstorm, superstorm, up until Sunday many believed I’d make a right and head out to sea.  I’ve been known to do that at least twice a year.  By many I mean the been fooled before, won’t get fooled again brethren.  Never the less with skeptiscm in my heart I picked up milk, cleared my deck, filled my tank, stashed some extra cash and waited to be proven a fooled again one more time.

Sunday confirmed the path and we hunkered down.  The winds began coming up Sunday night.  The girls had been out and done their best synchronized poop on command, “hurry up/good girls” (bless you yet again Shawn Stewart for advocating the “on command” part of life with a dog) and we were in for the night.

Monday morning we completed the remaining odds and ends; pulling soup from the freezer, making a tiny little lasagna and a peach upside down cake (God forbid there’s nothing to eat) were completed.  Candles ready, flashlight, Kindle, phone, Ipad fully charged.  Finished all the work I had brought home and relaxed the rest of the afternoon.  Took a long hot shower, have some dinner, pour a glass of red , check the storm coverage and at 9:15 we’re dark.  Ok. The girls had already been “synchronized” so we’re good.

Coinciding with the dark came a call from my dear friend Edith in Georgia.  I would know the sound of that voice anywhere and was thrilled to hear it coming through the dark.  She was doing what she does, checking in, praying and handing her love over to us right as the lights went out.  Some light comes from a cherished thirty five year friendship not the power company.

Not much to do now but pile in the bed with the girls and wait out the brunt of the storm which was in full swing. By now you all know that my Lina is a scaredy Mary Pit mix.  Every howl of the wind and she scooted a little closer.   The sound of the limbs snapping in the enchanted forest was distinct, heart breaking and very close…we managed to sleep and woke only a few times during the night.  I throw a hell of a storm.

The early morning brought torrential rain and then a drizzle…let’s go girls.  7:15 out the door, synchronized, back in the house and the rain and wind pick up again.  Of course we got a tiny reprieve to poop, let the blessings begin.

Terri, Muriel, Mom and I had been in almost constant contact through the mess.  Everybody was safe.  The number of people texting me to see if we were alright was heartwarming and welcome and reassuring.  My text replies to all at this point:  No power, no damage, old school coffee, could be worse, we’re fine.

It’s no surprise to anyone that I love my coffee so you won’t be surprised to find out I was the only one on Stowe Lane with an old school aluminum, stay cool handle, two cup, percolator and ground Starbucks (thank you Bill Sides, I adore you for keeping me stocked).  I call it my Father’s coffee pot (my Mother says it’s hers but everything above the basement was hers) because he used it to make a pot of coffee each day around mid-morning when he came home for “coffee and…”  I think he was forbidden to use the glass pot at one point when parts became difficult to get and extinction wasn’t far behind.

As the coffee began to perk on the stove the sound and smell transported me back so many years that it brought tears to my eyes.  Today in the eye of the storm I would be having coffee with my Father.  There is an art to making perked coffee that I was lucky enough to learn and master long ago and remember to this day.  You begin with a medium flame and as soon as the coffee starts to perk you turn it down to low.  The smell is intoxicating.  How long do you let it perk?  Well my Father timed it this way; turn it down, go to the bathroom, set the table, get two cookies out of the cookie jar, pull the milk out of the fridge and it’s ready.  The things you remember from a hundred years ago.

Text to Muriel: I have coffee.  Soon my Stowe Lane family was gathered at my table having coffee, yet another blessing.  It takes a certain kind of person to drink perked coffee; it’s stronger by virtue of how it’s passed through the grinds.  Needless to say our energy abounded for the rest of the day.

The girls and I took to our front room, our office, for a day of reading.  It’s the brightest room so we wouldn’t require flash lights, candles or lighted battery powered devices.  I warmed chicken soup on the stove, made crostini in a skillet and more coffee, then more reading.

A calm in the weather gave way to a walk around the neighborhood.  The damage seemed minimal so we felt blessed again even though we had no power.  More synchronization and we headed back home out of the snap in the air.

While I was enjoying my home, albeit without power, many others were in total devastation.  I had only the minimum contact with the outside world through what people were sharing on Facebook.  I didn’t have a battery powered radio and frankly I don’t think I would have allowed myself the total absorption that most people feel compelled to do in these circumstances.  I prayed for them, I wished speedy recovery, but I didn’t really know anything beyond my own little family.

My mother was also without power but her building is a senior housing building so their generator kept the heat on at a minimum and they had hallway lights.  Clever woman that she is, she perched herself in the doorway of her apartment and read by the light of the hallway emergency lights.  I thank God for her recent cataract surgery to bring back her love of reading over anything else.  And bless her for instilling that love of reading in both my sister and I.  The blessings continue.

My sister, on the other hand, was sitting in a parking lot staging area awaiting our friend, her best friend, Maria’s family’s rescue from their home in Little Ferry.  A dam broke in Moonachie and reached all the way into neighboring towns creating an emergency evacuation situation.  Maria now resides in California.  My sister did what we do; I am in awe of her and so proud of our family.  My mother was lamenting about feeling so helpless wishing she could do something.  She’s spent her whole life “doing something” she can sit down now, we got this.  Brava, Terri your friend Maria could not be more grateful that you got her family to Uncle Gus in Bergenfield.

Our evening meal was the left over lasagna warmed in the skillet.   Pour a glass of red; put a log on the fire and bursting through the door comes Muriel for a check-in…and a bottle of wine…and a can of Coke for Martina…and D batteries for the downstairs neighbor.  Another evening without power safely tucked away on Stowe Lane.

Halloween is cancelled.  The New York City parade can’t make it through the village because the village seems to be gone.  There is no access.  Our Governor has rescheduled Halloween for November 5th.  I am not a fan of our Governor but I must say he handled this situation with decisiveness, tough (and sometimes quite funny) talk, common sense and candor.  He doesn’t believe in many of the things that are important to me but I applaud his crisis management.

By day four my Mother is asking, What day is it?  I had to actually look at my phone to find out.  It’s Thursday Ma.  That there is more reading and more coffee and more reflecting is an understatement.  I take a little ride each day just to charge my phone and remember what it feels like to be out and about.  There isn’t much open and the desolation seems very Cormack McCarthy in areas.  I can see how people get to a point where they don’t want to leave their homes.  You start thinking 56 degrees isn’t that cold just put on another layer.  I don’t light the fire until it gets dark.  I’ve begun walking the dogs each time I feel a bit cold and it seems to do the trick.  We are indeed synchronized in this household.

Second round of texts:  Still no power, got hot water, got firewood, gas range, the now envied by all percolator, all in all quite blessed.

My friend Ev packs up her kids and brings them up for showers and breakfast.  They have no power, and since their house is all electric they have, well nothing.  Ahhhhh, there is nothing like a good hot shower to make a person feel human again.  I venture out to the store for non-refrigerated items and just to keep my driving skills and my phone charged.  I’ve cooked off some of the items in the freezer that have started to thaw and discarded most of what remains in the fridge.  The beauty and the blessing of a new refrigerator is that the seal is perfect.  Much of the food hasn’t even begun to thaw yet.

When the lights come back on I actually gasp as if it is the most wonderful gift I’ve ever been given.  My eyes fill up as I realize that so much is happening in our state that is devastating that it’s hard to keep up.  People have lost their lives, some are still missing, and the damage to homes and property will keep us busy for quite some time. There are gas lines and bickering, I can’t be the only one who remembers 1974 for crying out loud.  Much of our childhood’s memories have been washed out to sea with the boardwalk institutions.

Through this I remain grateful, for my home, my girls, my family, the Aunt Ms, my friends, neighbors and my colleagues who are all safe.  For the piece of nostalgia that has grounded the “it’s just stuff/it’s just cars” mantra.  To be able in all this mess to have coffee with Thomas has been a priceless moment brought about by a hurricane name Sandy.

Final text:  Power back, thawed out nicely, feeling pretty damned blessed, love you

To all of you who checked in and stayed in, I love you.  Terri, Mom, Muriel, Martina. Edith, Kyle, Kate, Nicole, Sandra, Marge, Barbara, Ev, Bill, Justin, Matt, Nancy Lynn, Tonine, Ki, Bev, Ally, Marlo, Jeanette, Fran, Penny, Linda, Corrine and Mick.

 

Hurricane Sandy reading list:

All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten,  Robert Fulghum, Ivy Books (or anything by Robert Fulghum)

La Bella Lingua, My love affair with Italian the world’s most enchanting language, Dianne Hales, Broadway Books

Walking Wisdom, Gotham Chopra with Deepak Chopra, Hyperion Books

How to Hepburn, Lessons on living from Kate the great., Karen Karbo, Bloomsbury Books

 

Nostalgia Walk

This morning was pretty cold when we started out and pretty dark too.  It wasn’t quite tights-under-your-sweats cold and I had on just the right layers to make for brisk walking and no stripping down half way through.  It was perfect really.  I had on a bright red fleece that, for some reason today, reminded me of a fleece I used to wear walking over twenty five years ago.  It belonged to my former husband’s late brother who once ran track at TZ High School.  It was old school fleece, thick and nubbley with the sewn in cuffs and zippers at the legs so you could get in and out easily.

There was a time when I walked every morning no matter the weather or the amount of sun light.  It was a terrific walk, usually with my sister-in-law, around my neighborhood.  We did a one mile loop around the tiny little park with the duck pond, up the hill, through the back roads then back on to Oak Tree Road and home.  We talked everyday about everything and the walk went very quickly, especially in the winter months. And then we didn’t walk anymore.  Things changed and I was very hurt for many years by our abrupt halt to the morning ritual.  I know why and I no longer fault anyone and have finally let it go.  I felt the hurt leave my mind and body as I watched her walk away from my new home, irony at its best.

When I first arrived on Stowe Lane I ventured out for a walk with the girls and it was quite an escapade with two scared rescues.  This morning I realized just how far we’ve come.  We’ve honed our lives and our walk to fit where we are in life.  We’ve reversed the route just recently, originally to avoid the lunatic dog that the woman around the corner keeps off leash, to include the hill side of Mark Twain.

What I also realized this morning with the chill in the air, the red fleece, the hill, the neighbors waving on their way to work, the sidewalks, the duck pond on Mark Twain, the very good company I was walking with is that I didn’t lose anything.  I’ve gained a neighborhood, two walking partners who listen to every word I say (mostly) and the comfort of a home that is blessed.

 

Ever wonder where you’d end up if you took your dog for a walk and never once pulled back on the leash? ~Robert Brault

 

Dear Honey

On this anniversary I thought that the best way to honor you and celebrate your life would be to cook!  So today I put on a pot of sauce and relived all the silly things we’ve done in the kitchen.  I’ll always remember us being jammed into the little kitchen on Oak Tree Road making sauce, and ravioli and mozzarella. God, that was a blast. I will always have fond memories of you in the kitchen cooking some damn thing for dinner…and lunch the next day… and some for the freezer…

We still miss you every day and not a day goes by without mentioning your name or telling one of the many funny stories.  Just this morning we had a real belly laugh about the time Terri woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t move her head.  I know it sounds scary but the truth of the matter is that you were playing basketball in your sleep and palming her head as the ball.   God there are a million of these we will replay for the rest of our lives.

One of your football kids took the scholarship this May.  You knew him; he met you at some game or another and thought you were pretty cool (of course he did).  Kenneth Furlong will forever remember you and the boost he got from your Foundation. Bravo!

I know you see that Terri is more amazing as the days go by.  She’s on the board of the condo association, and running for another term.  She’s making a difference following in your footsteps but with her own quiet consideration for people.  She’s determined to make a community where one once was when you were the de-facto mayor.

She still misses you very much but is learning that sorrow can become a celebration of life with the help of her posse; those women continue to astound me with their love of her. Isabel and Ethan are growing up to be quite protective of Miss Terri, making sure to check for her car before they go to sleep each night.  You want to make sure a person comes home to love, give the job to two of the most wonderful upstairs children in the world.

Well Honey the sauce was wonderful, enjoyed by the neighborhood, safely stashed in the freezer and certainly would have met with your approval. Listen for the toast at Thanksgiving! Salute; take care of Thomas, Love San

 

Today Was That Day

Today was that day in October that I had to turn the heat on. Change the filter in the furnace. Take the screen out of the storm door and put in the glass. Wash the window. Take in the plants from the deck for fear of frost.  Put on a turtleneck for the morning walk and leave my sneakers and socks on all day long.  Wear a sweater. Switch out the sandal slippers for the pile-lined moccasins. Have a glass of red instead of white.  Turn the oven on to make dinner.  Put a throw across the bottom of the bed.

I have a mostly love, sometimes hate, relationship with this time of year. Autumn brings thoughts of Honey and how much we miss him.  It brings an end to the farmers market’s colorful fruits and vegetables to make way for the sturdier harvest.  It brings soups and stews and baking.  It brings nights by the fire and thicker coats on the dogs.  It brings dark mornings and more layers for walking.  It ushers in the holidays and the nostalgia of days past.

It is essential to me to nest into my home.  I love everything about my home and this time of year forces me to look around at each item and its story and oh there are so many stories.  The other life stories are tucked away in notebooks and photo albums and cedar chests.  The now life stories surround me every day and remind me of the wonderful life that is now mine.

Welcome to autumn; my roasted tomato tart is ready to come out of the oven.

 

MMS (Makes Me Smile)

It’s been an amazing day on Stowe Lane.  That alone makes me smile.  After yesterday’s Defining Moments post I am delighted to share some of the tiny little defining moments that made me smile today.  My top ten MMS of today:

MMS to see the first text of the day, sent the previous night, included a quote that made them think of me, love that.  Watch for the quote in Sunday’s post.

Peanut butter and jelly for breakfast MMS

MMS every day to use my new coffee pot, makes hot delicious crema topped espresso in a minute.  Note to the Aunt M’s, it’s no longer a process to make latte, you’ll be fine when you have to make my coffee every morning when I get old.  No sippy cup filled with wine until lunchtime.  God love you both for becoming my Stowe Lane family.  That definitely MMS EVERYDAY

Dancing MMS.  Even after almost three weeks. Knowing that the cool down song was a gift meant for me. “When there’s so many beautiful reasons I have to be happy.”…Natasha Bedingfield

Watching someone recognize their own power and use their energy for themselves, finally, after some tiny little thing you did made a difference. I know like I know that MMS

MMS learning that a contractor referral you made turned out very well.  So well it might result in a date for her best friend.  God love my Jewish friends they all have the matchmaker gene.  And even more they mostly have UN-handy husbands so my contractor will do very well indeed.

MMS to have the most beautiful day to drive with the top down in October.

Raising a significant amount of money for my favorite charity fills my heart with joy especially after reading all of the comments and personal notes that accompanied many of the donations.  Just ask and you shall receive. MMS to know I have the most amazing people.

MMS to discover the clicking noise I make that sends the dogs into play.

Last but certainly not least, Toto and Lina MMS Terri MMS ReeRee MMS

There is something in everyday that makes me smile.  What makes you smile?